Vanity is Not Cute- 5 reasons why self-esteem should come from within

Happy Saturday everyone! Today is the last day before I have to go back to school…boo! Spring break has gone by SO fast, I’ve been working on several projects for First Class and hopefully I’ll be able to share them with you guys soon! 🙂

Anyway, I’m excited about today’s topic because I think it’s something a lot of you guys will be able to relate to. Our society has become increasingly centered around how we look. I believe this is largely due to the growth of social media and the significant role Hollywood has in it. It seems like every time I go on Twitter or even turn on the TV I’m bombarded by images of insanely attractive people who look as though they haven’t eaten a slice of bread in ten years. I’ve talked about how I think we should always look presentable and I stick to that, I definitely think that taking care of ourselves and taking the time to look presentable is important.

The problem with our society being so focused on appearances is 1) I think people (us girls especially) go to extreme lengths to fit the role of what we think beauty should be, some times leading to anorexia or a different health disorder and 2) because we only focus on our looks, our self-esteem becomes completely reliant on whether or not someone else finds us attractive.


I know, it’s crazy. So ladies here are five reasons why this needs to change, pronto.

1- You can never reach “perfect’: If you rely entirely on your looks, you will always be trying to reach this unattainable standard set by an actress on TV or a model in a magazine. As cliche as this is going to sound, IT’S NOT REAL. Okay yes, undoubtedly those women are beautiful, but they don’t look like they do on TV or in magazines, what you see there is the result of hours of make-up and editing. If you compare yourself to what you see in the media you will never be happy with your body because you simply cannot resemble something that is fake.

2- They don’t care as much as you do: Okay so you work out, you eat nothing, you put on make-up, and force your hair to behave itself, and yet  you don’t get the compliments you were looking for so your confidence is gone. No matter how fabulous you look, you will not necessarily get the praise you want. People are so focused on themselves that they don’t always notice how your eyes are perfectly lined or how those pants make your legs look thinner. Even your close friends or boyfriend may not mention anything, but they think you’re always beautiful simply because of who you are!  (I hope). So if you want to dress up, make that extra effort in the morning, fine! You go girl, but do it for yourself, not anyone else.

3- It really is superficial: your looks are just a small part of who you are. I promise. You can be the most beautiful person alive and if you’re not kind or loving or nice to be around, people still won’t like you! Yes, looks are what people see first so we should always try to wear clothes that represent us in a small way, but if that’s all you have, then you really don’t have anything because looks are the most superficial level of a person.

4- It won’t work: Even if you make an effort to look your best every day, there will always be days that you don’t feel it. Maybe you didn’t have time to fix your hair just right, or maybe your pants feel a little tight, whatever it may be. So, what now? Is your confidence going to plummet because of that? Will you go the whole day feeling morose and unlovable because you don’t look “perfect”? This is why confidence cannot come from your looks, looks fade! They even vary one day to the next! Your confidence has to rely on something more stable, otherwise you will never truly have high self-esteem.

5- Beauty comes from within: I know how it sounds, you don’t want to be beautiful on the inside! You want to look desirable on the outside! And you do, but if you want to have really good friends or an amazing boyfriend, you’re gonna have to have more than good looks. Because other people who are fun and loving and kind are looking for more than that! And so are you, if you meet an incredibly attractive guy who within five seconds proves he’s a jerk, are you going to hang around? No! (at least I hope not). This is because even though looks are important to us, we really look for inner beauty. Someone who laughs a lot and makes us feel good inside, someone who smiles genuinely and radiates happiness. That is what we should aim for.

So go to the gym, eat healthy, dress well, do it! But always remember that your self-esteem needs to come from your belief that you are enough. Just the way you are. You’re not perfect, you don’t look perfect, but all your good qualities as a person overshadow any physical “flaws” you might have.

“You are beautiful my love, there is no flaw in you.” Songs of Solomon. It’s true!

As always let me know what you think, do you rely too much on looks for your self-worth? Comment below!

Hope this helps!



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